Countdown to "Operation Act Like A Lush"

Tomorrow I am getting on a flight to Vegas. Viva Las Vegas. Sin City. Where you don't go to bed until 7 AM. Where it's customary (at least for me) to have champagne for breakfast. And at lunch. And at dinner if I feel like it. Martinis in the casino lounge. Mai Tais at the pool.

Uh.oh. I can't drink! Well, shit.

M knows that I'm pregnant and is prepared to participate in the subterfuge that is about to take place starting tomorrow. There are a few folks that are going to be in Vegas that I'm not ready to know yet so....OPERATION ACT LIKE A LUSH beings tomorrow!

I have come up with some different ideas.
1) THE SNEAKY LIE - Many of the people I know won't be there until the 2nd night, so I'm goign to proclaim, "OMG! I got sooooooo shitfaced last night that the THOUGHT of alcohol right now makes me want to hurl." (however, that is really only going to work that one time)

2) THE POUR OUT - Just buy a drink, pretending to drink on it, and take random bathroom breaks to pour it out. (but really....if I ain't drinkin' it, I sure don't want to buy it!)

3) THE FAKE - Sprite with a splash of grenadine. Voila! My pretend vodka drink.

4) LIKE A VIRGIN - at the pool or wherever....three words...VIRGIN.STRAWBERRY.DACQUIRI.

My parents (god love 'em) said, "why don't you just say you aren't in the mood to drink or that you are cutting back?"

Huh....wait.....hahaha...HUH?...I laugh in your face. Cuz ain't none of my buddies in Vegas gonna believe THAT shit!

So game plan is set....though I'm still trying to figure out how i'm going to explain the turning down the champagne thing. Sniffle. Sniffle.

Crocodile Tears

My dad gets what i refer to as his "crocodile tears". He tears up easily in his older age and his eyes water up threatening to spill over. Sometimes you want to hug him, sometimes you want to hit him because he's either being sincere or you've (ahem, I've) just told him basically that what he has done the past few years effin' sucks and he needs to go find his balls again (I personally think they are hidden in the pocket of his new wife's purse, but what do I know?!) Anyways, on to the story...

So today we went to lunch. A few months ago I had him look at my plan for my backporch. I want to turn it into sunroom/office in hopes of turning my now office into a baby's room. He priced it for me and everything, and I told him I'd let him know when I wanted to start. Today at lunch I brought it up again telling him that I needed to know where to start first - that I'd have to do a little each month. He told me and I replied, "okay. Well, I want to get started and I'm going to need it finished by March." He was like, "huh? why March?" I smiled and said, "i just need it done in 9 months."

He jumped up and hugged me and then sat down. And there they were. The Crocodile Tears. And not because I had just told him he was an idiot. Nope. These were sincere. It made me feel good.

I really shouldn't be so hard on him, huh?

Faint No More!

I waited until this morning to test again, and there is nuttin' faint about that line people!!! It looks like I'm pregnant! My due date (unofficial I guess since it's the internet telling me and not a doctor) is March 7th.

I am so excited. I've been in the best mood this weekend. The "WTF have I done" symptoms haven't sunk in (and they will....just gotta be honest here!), but I'm sure they will show up when the other symptoms join the party.

And can you believe I'm about to go to Vegas AND WON'T BE ABLE TO DRINK?!Holy pink panties, Batman! That will make for a very interesting trip for sure. However, I can think of two great things to come from this (other than the fact that I"m pregnant because that is the best thing, of course)...

1)I won't be on my period! Woohoo!Who wants to be on their period on vaction?! Not me!

and

2)Good Lawd, I'm going to save some money since I won't be buying tons of $10 drinks!

So, here's to a healthy and happy 9 months. And the only thing I ask of you, my friends that read my rambles, is prayers. I hope and pray that this time has a much happier ending than last time. Because I can't wait!

Cliffhanger!

Sorry...I find great fun in leaving people hanging. LOL when I tested yesterday I got a veeeeeeeeeeery faint line. Now, I've looked at enough negative tests to know when there is something there and when there is not. Well....THERE IS SOMETHING THERE! So I tested again this morning. Still faint. But still there. I will hold off now until Sunday, and hopefully, that pink line will be much darker then.

Big smiles here.

I Wanted a Margarita

I'm going to meet Mama in a bit to eat dinner at the Mexican restaurant. I was sitting on the couch a bit ago and thought...



I want a magarita.

then the crazy thought, "I should take a test. If there is nothing there, I'm getting a margarita. If there is something there, I'm not getting a margarita."

Off to the store I went...back home, into the bathroom, do my business....

Well,after looking at the stick, it looks like I'm NOT getting that margarita after all.

Mama's Funny

So, Mama and I really don't talk about this whole baby process. Oh sure, she was totally on board when I got that positive last time. But we don't have long drawn out conversations about what I'm doing. Sometimes I wonder if she even remembers that I'm doing it at all! So I was surprised the other day when I was over helping her clean up Mema's house. I was getting ready to leave and she said, "You need to be careful." I was like, "why?" She said, "Because of those sperm in you, you need to be careful with all that crazy excercising!" this made me crack up. She might have even said "spermies" but I forget now. (and I don't excercise crazy! Maybe an hour 5 times a week now that I"m out for summer vacation!)

Anyways, as I'm still laughing about that she says she's got something to get out of the car for me. She hands me a basket that she took from my house and a book. Ready for the title? - "Balancing Pregnancy and Work" Too funny!

I guess she does have the whole thing on her mind!

1WW and Douche Bags!

So, nothing new to report here. No symptoms that I can't contribute to something else. I did feel a little "funny" last night for a brief period. I was at work and this weird feeling just came over me, but I blamed how dead it was and that THAT was what was making me feel...blah, for lack of a better word. So one week...one week til I either get a pink line or a pink pantyliner (too much information for you? Oops. Sorry. haha)

Funny little story though. 3 Douche bags walked out on their tab last weekend at work to the tune of $75 out of my pocket. I was irate.YOU DO NOT MESS WITH MY EFFIN' MONEY. Well, luck was on my side and I was able to get one of their phone numbers and find two of them on facebook. I called the one guy 3 days in a row and messaged two of them on facebook. No response! I warned them I'd let the owners handle it when they returned from vacation. The third night I called them I was in a funny mood. Some people were sitting at the bar I knew and I grabbed two other waitresses to listen in on my conversation. I called and left a message (making my voice crack and sound pitiful) saying, "I work a full time job. This is my part time job that I work 20-25 hours a week. I am PREGNANT and am going to be a single mother! I need my money!!!" i hung up the phone and one of the guys who knows me said, "SHELBY! ARE YOU PREGNANT?!" I was like, "hell no!!!"....

....at least that I know of...but he doesn't need to know that, now does he?!! haha

(and if you are wondering about the douche bags and my money...we looked on the video tape and had them jumping over the back fence, the owner called and threatened them with an arrest warrant, they FINALLy responded, and I got my money back PLUS a $50 tip. Jeez...I have no tolerance for 23 year old douche bags!)

Take Two (or is it Take 5?)

And we're off....Just came back from the doctor. The deed has been done.

I always wonder what other people in my situation do after the doctor leaves the room. After the doctor leaves you lay there for about 20 - 30 minutes. They even ask you if you want the lights on or off. To set the mood, maybe? I know women with their husbands probably sit there and talk. When J went with me that time, there I was with my knees in the air, she was in the corner chair, and we chatted. I assume a husband and wife would do that too. But the single gals like me? What do they do?

I can tell you what I did this time. I did not have the lights off (mainly because I had my book with me. I'm all about my summer reading!)So I stuck my earphones in and turned on my Ipod. I purposely picked one song to listen to this time. I played "Baby Mine" by Bette Midler and prayed. I prayed it would work. No matter how many scared and freaked out thoughts I have when it does work. And I will. Because I have freaked out everytime I've done this and especially the time it did work. I mean, who isn't scared in this process no matter what route they go? So i prayed throughout the whole song.That this time would be the time. Then I clicked on my "Low Key Music" playlist and started reading. (A Soft Place to Land by Susan Rebecca White justin case anyone cares). And I read until C, the nurse, came and said that was that.

And...that was that. Now I wait. It's so crazy how obsessive you become during this wait period. You try not to be. But it just can't be helped. I'll try not to think about it...put my mind on other things....finally clean my office room....scrapbook last summer's fabulous pictures into an album....blah, blah, blah...mainly try not waste countless minutes and hours googling every little thing about feritilzation, ovulation, and implantation!!!

Only two weeks time will tell.

And...here we go again.

Well, my first back into trying did not work this time. I started my period, packed my bags and headed to Key West. I would have headed to KW regardless (would have been a totally different trip, but would have done it.)

I was thinking since I was out of town, and the doctor's office likes to see me the first two days of my period that this month would be out. But I was wrong. They told me to come in when I got back. I went in this morning and started all over.

However, here's an interesting tidbit. Remember when I won the money on the scratch off lottery ticket at the beginning of the year? I had found the new donor I liked that was the....gasp....brunette with hazel/green eyes???LOL Well!!! when I tried last month he was my first choice and wasn't available, so I went with blond haired blue eyed choice #2. Guess what? My first choice was available this time and gotta love that the lady on the phone said, "My...he's a popular one!" That just made me laugh when she said it.

I go in again on Thursday and we'll see where it goes from there.